Journal

The Hangover

2009-12-22T23:43:51Z

One casualty of the Christmas season is the endless array of parties. I have been to Christmas parties almost every night for the past two weeks. Booze is abundant in such parties. I have been lucky. So far I have yet to come home and awaken the next day feeling like someone drove a spike through the back of my head.

A lot of guys have their so-called cure for a hangover. Some resort to sweating it out in a steam bath or sauna. Others resort to exercise. Some even choose to take another swig of beer or wine.

What I realized that once you have a hangover, there is no turning back. You have to grin and bear it. Time is the only cure for a hangover. Your body needs to flush out whatever toxins you have imbibed. Rest plus lots of liquids, perhaps some aspirin and some vitamins, may help relieve the pain and assist in the recovery.

The trick is really to avoid the hangover.

Some go to extremes in trying to avoid a hangover, including taking a teaspoon of butter which they claim will line their stomach with enough oil and fat to counteract the alcohol. I have only found one way to minimize the chances of a hangover.

Do you notice that you pee more often when you drink? That's because alcohol blocks the creation of vassopressin. Without this chemical, your kidneys send water directly to your bladder instead of it being absorbed by your body. Studies have shown that you will dispel four times as much liquid as gained. So that dry mouth, nausea, and headache you feel is actually the result of dehydration. (Source)

So to avoid the hangover, you have to drink water. And lots of it.

Water.

Drink water while you ingest alcohol.

Drink water even if you aren't thirsty.

Drink water when you get home.

I always have bottles of water in my car. I also keep a bottle of water at my bedside. If you are lucky and end up in a motel, remember that motels also have complimentary bottles of water.

So drink water and be ready for the next party!

(Photo by psychedelicyaya)

Choices and Compromises

2009-12-14T00:03:37Z

Last week, one of my reputable handlers emailed me his latest escort. She is a model and I was lucky enough to see her in person before I found out she was in the trade. She is ramp-model tall, slim, with a torso that tapered between curvaceous breasts and full hips. Plus she had those almond eyes that always draw me in.

She was pricey but not unreasonable for a model. Plus it was for two pops. I figured that there would be a catch and I figured that she would have that haughty and arrogant attitude that often accompanied beautiful models. But for two pops I was willing to gamble that my charms would at least break through that ice-princess demeanor.

The handler returned with some scathing feedback. He was disgusted with her attitude. He had arranged her with an important client and, at the last minute, she decided to change the arrangements. She changed the schedule and the meeting place, and, in the end, she backed out of the deal without even offering any apologies.

"Totally unprofessional," he said. "For that amount, you would be better off with..." and he gave the name of a model that had appeared in some soft-core exploitation flick and in a leading men's mag. This model, however, though admittedly pretty, was less of my type than the aforementioned beaut.

Hence the quandary i am in: an escort that is my type but with an unpredictable, if not pompous, attitude; or an escort who can bring an A-game but is not exactly my type.

Strangely, to the dismay of the handler (who had cracked that I must be a masochistic necrophiliac) and to my own surprise, I am still drawn to the ice princess. I may be rationilizing---or totally fooling myself---that maybe she had an off-day and that Maybe my charms can break the ice. Or maybe I just like a challenge sprinkled with a morbid curiousity. It may be a waste of time, or even a waste of the money to pay for the room, or I may garner the ire of a reputable handler. But if I do get her in bed, at best it can be a memorable tryst, and at worst I can still stick it to her for all her arrogance.

Motel Shot

2009-12-11T00:38:16Z

Shot taken at Victoria Court at Canley.

Sexbomb music video for the 2010 automated elections

2009-12-09T03:05:39Z

One thing is for sure: I am not the target market for this music video. The lyrics are terrible. My brain refuses to retain the words and the beat. Their dancing is horrible. After just a few minutes I had to look away. Not even a sense of morbid curiosity could keep me glued to this video.

Not interested

2009-12-03T00:34:20Z

There was this escort I wanted to try. I had seen her pics through a variety of sites. She had this sweet but feisty Asian look, pouty hamster cheeks, short hair that reminded me of those cutesy anime girls, and a curvaceous figure. I was able to track her down and get the number of her handler.

"How much?" I asked. "And what services does she provide?"

The handler said that her fee is P20k. Not bad, I thought. Except that the handler advised the catch: That's P20k for just one pop.

"How much for two pops?" I asked.

Double the fee, the handler said. P40k. The handler added that the escort will not take any less because she is an FHM model and a member of the Viva Hot Babes. I checked Viva's website and I didn't find her picture. I didn't bother checking FHM for lack of time.

As a comparison, I talked to my usual handlers for some comparison shopping. The FHM models in their lineups are at P25k with multiple pops. A young starlet who is a member of a recognized all-girl troupe charges P45k for multiple pops, and this starlet is quite well-known, having appeared in several men's magazines.

So I balked. I thanked the handler and advised that I was not interested. It was not solely because of the price. There was something about the escort's attitude that didn't sit well with me. There was an air of arrogance. Or is it pig-headedness? As if she was bestowing some special privilege for me spending some hours with her. I imagined her rushing me to finish the deed, acting smug and non-chalant about the affair. For P40k, there damn should be more than just a romp under the sheets!

30 tips for newbie PSPs

2009-12-01T00:04:02Z

I have assembled 30 tips for the newbie PSP. Most of these may already be common knowledge for the experienced PSP.

1. Before you take the plunge, consider other options. The life of a PSP is a hard life wrought with many shady characters and with many dire consequences. It should always be considered as the last resort.

2. Remember this: it's just a job. If you come home safe with cash in hand, then shrug off the day, get some sleep, and live on for the next day.

3. Protect your privacy

4. Don't use your real name in dealing with customers.

5. Don't provide your personal email address. Use another email address.

6. Don't provide your personal mobile number. Have another sim card. And it must be a prepaid number

7. Never divulge your address. Not even hint on the general vicinity.

8. Provide a picture. I know that this is contrary to the previous tips, but you can always deny that the picture is indeed you. Especially if you provided a different email address and used a different mobile number.

9. Know about sex. Research. Get a porn movie. Read Kama Sutra.

10. Think about the "menu" of services, especially the following: CIM or not, BBBJ or BJ with condom, GFE, PSE.

11. Divulge the following up front: the price, number of hours, the number of pops, the "services" that you will and won't provide.

12. No cancellation fees. Unless you provided a picture.

13. Expect that you will meet a lot of assholes. They will haggle. They will not show up. However, rest assured that just because you dealt with a jerk doesn't mean that the next guy will be a jerk.

14. Insist that the guy call you. Don't rely on text messages, email, or chats. You can tell a lot by the guys tone of voice, his proficiency in speaking, his use of grammar.

15. Trust your instincts when talking to the guy. If you are not comfortable with him, apologize and end the conversation.

16. Note down the guy's phone number.

17. Finalize the specifics of your rendezvous. Agree on a time and place.

18. Only agree to meet in a public place. Coffee shops and mall lobbies are good places to meet.

19. Dress appropriately. Please don't come in spaghetti-strapped blouse and skimpy shorts.

20. Someone you trust should know your whereabouts. You don't have to say that you are out screwing some stranger in some motel. Just give the general vicinity. "Am in the Sta. Mesa area near SM" is good enough.

21. Program emergency contact numbers (friends, relatives) into your phone as speed dial

22. Be prompt

23. Do "it" in a well-established place---a hotel or a motel, for example.

24. Insist in a condom

25. If you are uncomfortable, then walk away. If the guy changes the deal, walk away. If the guy does not seem safe, then walk away.

26. At least, fake it.

27. When with a client, don't use your mobile phone.

28. Don't hurry.

29. Have more frequent health checks.

30. Respect the privacy of your customer. Do not divulge his personal information

In future posts, I will be expounding on these tips.

Got any more? Leave a few personal tips at the comments section.

Car Show Photos

2009-11-28T09:28:04Z

STD checking

2009-11-25T10:47:39Z

In my pay-for-play exploits, I have one cardinal rule---use a condom. I know that using a condom is not a 100% guarantee against sexually transmitted diseases (STDs), but I suppose that I have more chances getting hit by a car than getting an STD while using a condom. When I get emails from readers divulging that they have STDs, all of them have admitted that, at some point in time, they had sex without a condom.

So let's say you had a moment of weakness and went unprotected. Maybe it was that alcohol you imbibed or that erotic lady you paid for that clouded your judgement. Your tryst is wild and wanton. But then your urges have been assuaged, and you regain your senses, and the fear of an STD gnaws in your psyche like Rod Serling's earwig. I need not elaborate on the list of possible STDs; there's Google and Wikipedia for that. (Coincidentally, as I was writing this, Philippine Star came out with an article on genital warts) The symptoms of STD include soreness, unusual lumps or sores, itching, pain when urinating, or a discharge. Some diseases take days to show its symptoms; AIDS symptoms show up in months or years if untreated. Peace of mind can only be obtained by visiting a doctor. If you have any of the symptoms, you definitely have to see a doctor. And avoid any sexual contact until you are cleared.

Visiting a doctor for a STD examination need not be an humiliating moment. You can go to any hospital front desk and ask for a urologist. A urologist does not only handle STDs---they also handle kidney disorders and urinary tract infections---so right off the bat you have some other plausible explanation why you are need to see a urologist.

You then go to the clinic, fill up the forms, write down any name you want (they don't ask for identification), and tell the doctor that you want be tested for an STD. There's no reason to be ashamed. Lots of guys get STDs.

The doctor will put on gloves and examine your genitals. I've always wondered if there are sexy female urologists. I bet that if there is one, there'll be a surge of men having themselves tested.

The examination is rudimentary. The standard blood test, which is needed for HIV testing, is painless. One "standard" test, however, is for the urologist to shove a swab inside your urethra. Yes, gentlemen, that's the duct inside your penis where both urine and semen pass through. The doctor will instruct your to take a deep breath, hold it, and then when he is inserting it inside your penile canal, you should let loose a slow exhale. Does it relieve the pain? No.

One of my friends who went through a STD test also had to go through a prostate examination. He detailed how the assistant inserted a finger up his anus, probed for the prostate, pressed down on the prostate hard enough to let loose some fluid. My friend said that he had to hold on to some railing inside the clinic and when it was over, he was surprised to find that tears have rolled down his cheeks. Sheesh, even while writing this I get the goose bumps.

I have heard that treatment for some STDs is easy and straight-forward, provided that it is detected early. Treatment for some STDs (like gonorrhea) is just some pills. I have heard that treatment for genital warts is similar as that of the "normal" warts---cauterization. I can imagine some miniature light saber thingy carving away that nasty wart just as one would carve a slice of ham on Christmas eve.

But if you think that is nasty, imagine what would happen when you tell your companion that you obtained some disease and that you could have passed it to her. Good luck with that.

(Photo Credit)

Thoughts while having a burger

2009-11-24T00:33:36Z

Last weekend I took a friend out to Greenbelt where we watched 2012. She had originally wanted to watch New Moon, to which I promptly declared "Over my dead body!" Fortunately, 2012 was showing in one theater. 2012, while probably just as brainless, was at least entertaining. While leaving the theater, a group of guys were proclaiming superatives at the movie.

"Fantastic!" they said.

"Best movie I have seen!" another said.

"Best movie ever!"

I shuddered. Best movie ever? I mean, has this guy ever watched a movie? Has he been stuck with mindless Pinoy slapstick comedies and drama flicks with talentless performers?

I then took her to Lusso. I was curious about their Foie Gras Burger, which I read about at Our Awesome Planet. It was, as Anton Diaz raved, better than delicious. My companion raved about it as well. "Much better than Jollibee." I shuddered once more. At P600 a burger, it better be fucking better than Jollibee! "Best burger I've tasted!" she proclaimed.

And so as I tasted the melted Cambozola cheese, as I savored the succulent fatty liver flavor, as the burger juices oozed through my fingers, I realized that some people are not suited to be critics and reviewers. In the context of this site, some people cannot be trusted when it comes to giving "field reports," which are, in the adult forum parlance, conveniently abbreviated to "FRs."

Movie critics and movie reviewers watch hundreds of movies. They watch comedies, musicals, love stories, horror movies, thrillers, foreign films, black-and-white films, short films, animated films, documentaries. Some have studied film. They are particular of the nuances of cinematography, soundtrack, and screenwriting.

A person would probably describe a Jollibee burger as delicious, but I wonder if that person's description would change once he has experienced a Foie Gras burger. How can one say that some burger is the "best" if he hasn't tried all the burgers? How can one say that a given product or service is 10 out of 10 if all the person experienced is those in the "Happy Budget Meal" category?

So when some bozo decides to produce FR, I wonder what qualifications he would consider a perfect score. Virgins would probably rate their first sexual encounters as a 10 out of 10, regardless of what the PSP did. She could be fast asleep for all we know.

The Sperm Test

2009-11-23T00:36:14Z

A few days ago, for no special reason than to assuage my curiosity, I decided to get a sperm test. I imagined a private room with adult videos. And maybe there would be a sexy female assistant to "assist" me. Perhaps she would be clad in a pristine-white nurse uniform, just like this:

Sadly it was not the case.

The doctor gave me a small plastic cup and gestured me to enter his private washroom, which was so small that I could not stretch my arms horizontally without touching the walls. The assistant was a scrawny, curly-haired female with the sex appeal of a turtle. The doctor offered me some magazines, which were faded, crumpled, and had off-putting white stains where the pages obviously stuck together. I frantically did my business and spewed my manhood into the receptacle. I had sex the day before so I was not exactly proud of the volume.

It took the doctor just a few minutes to do his analysis, which did little to reassure me. Fortunately, he came back and said that my sperm count is above average with good motility. I felt like a kid that just got a passing grade. At least I can still father a child. But after a few minutes, I was not sure I was just handed over good or bad news. On one hand, I could get someone pregnant. On the other hand, I could get someone pregnant! One thing is certain---I'll still have to be wearing a condom while paying close attention to my partner's ovulation cycle.

(Photo Credit)